Is Your “Online Life” causing IRL Trouble? The Truth about the Overlap… (For Content Creators)



Ciao lovelies! Recently I was in a class, and as I often am asked to do when starting new classes, I shared a “fun fact” about myself. My go-to “fun fact” about myself is, of course, that I run OFT. I use this “Fun-Fact” in most of my classes, and because of this I know of quite a few people from “IRL” (In Real Life) who read OFT. Today, I sat down to write for OFT. I was planning to write an article about Age Regression, but then I stopped, because it occurred to me, for really the first time ever- OFT, and my entire online existence isn’t JUST online. This stuff spills over into real life. At that point, lovelies, I panicked.


It’s never truly hit me before that hey, this stuff is REAL. As many in my generation who grew up with the emergence of technology- like social media, smartphones, and so on- I tend to view my “online life” as completely separate, compartmentalized, from my real life. (IRL). But the more I take steps to move OFT to being something “serious,” the more it leaks into “real” life.


EDIT + DISCLAIMER: Please do keep in mind that this post is an opinion post and not meant to be used as legal advice of any kind! I am merely writing about personal experience and this may not apply to everyone!


Why did I panic when I realized this? For starters, sometimes I get very personal on OFT, and to realize, truly realize and understand that there are other very real people on the other side of that screen who read that… who can judge that… honestly, that’s kind of scary. Even to me, someone who’s been judged online for a long time, the idea of judgement is scarier when you put it into real world context like that. Because it’s one thing to be judged by some anonymous person who you don’t know, but it’s a whole lot more serious and thought-provoking (and maybe even a little scary) to be judged by someone who you do know.

All that said, yes, I panicked when this realization struck me…but then, I really thought hard about it. I spent some time really thinking about what it means to be judged, and what it means to be vulnerable, and what it means to be a content creator of the type that I am….what it means to be me.

What does all this mean, for me, you, and other content creators like us?


In class today, my professor gave the lecture on aligning your values and strengths with your “Hustle.” She explained that your values can be something that inspires you, drives you, makes you passionate, even something that makes you angry. Something that you want to learn about, something that motivates you…things like that. On the same note, your Strengths are your skills, things that you bring to the table. Your gifts. Your talents. Your skills. Even your past experiences.

For the last activity, she asked us to make a Venn Diagram. One circle would be for Strengths. The other circle, for values. The intersection was where our “hustle” should go.

Naturally, I wanted to figure out what drives me to do what I do for OFT. Why do I want to create? What gets me pumped up to make blog posts/videos/etc.? Why do I create?

As I looked over what I had written for strengths, and tried to align those with what I had written for values, something stood out to me. A value that I had written clearly and had really focused on. What had I written for that value?

“Joy.”


That’s pretty open-ended. What I meant by “Joy,” though, was pretty specific.

When I say that I value “Joy,” what I mean is that I value creating Joy in others, and myself. I value the creation of joy, happiness, pleasantness. The creation of Joy.

That is why I do what I do.


Okay, so now we know why I do what I do. Why I constantly work harder, learn more, try harder, get better. Why I create.

How does knowing this apply to the overlap that I discovered with my real life and with my online life?

Knowing why I create helped me to understand that, for me, 

the overlap doesn’t matter.*


Did you catch that? It doesn’t matter to me. Even though I panicked at first, I realize now that if this is what I want- to create joy through my online content- that YES, that might come with some overlap, and YES, I want to sometimes allow myself to be open to critics, and vulnerable, and YES, I might get judged, and YES, I might not like what people have to say.

But at the end of the day, does being judged hurt less when you know that you have a purpose behind what you’re doing?

YES.


Let’s return to the original statement now, the reason you’re reading this post. If you clicked this post based off the title, you might be an online content creator who is worried about IRL judgement for online content.

I want to help ease some of your worries about that. 

Let’s talk about how you can feel less anxious about judgement.


My biggest advice to any online content creator who is afraid of real life judgment for their creations is this:

Remember why.


Remember WHY you wanted to start making content. Are you an artist? Maybe you began sharing your artwork online because you have a passion for aesthetics, art, and wanted to share your own personal takes on it? Are you a motivational internet personality? Maybe you began making motivational Instagram  (or other social platform) posts because you wanted to help others? Are you a musician? A film-maker? An author? A teacher?

My point is simple- Remember WHY. If you hold onto your “Why,” you’ll never need to ask yourself the age-old question of “what if?” “What if my work is terrible?” “What if I get judged?” “What if they don’t like it?”

Silence the noise with your “Why.”


Instead of “What if my work is terrible,” remember, “I share my work to educate and inspire.”

Instead of “What if they judge me,” you can recall, “I share my content to help others in need.”

Instead of “What if they don’t like it,” you can know that, “I make my content in my own way, because I like it.”


Summary


To summarize briefly: Recently I realized that the work I share online affects my real life. But, because I am proud of the work I do and the content I share, if I get judged for it, I feel confident facing the judgement. Simply because I allow my reason why I started to continue to guide my path.


What do you think? Are you an online content creator? Do you fear “IRL” overlap? If you do, have you tried recalling your reason for starting to give you confidence? In other words, what do you think of the points I have made? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below. Oh, and please share with anyone you think could find this article helpful.


*The overlap might matter to a future employer, etc. Please keep this in mind as the advice in this post may not be suitable for everyone. 
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Thanks again for reading, remember to stay awesome, love yourself, and I'll see you in our next post!

5 Comments

  1. This is an interesting post. I've always been very aware and careful of how your internet life can be traced back to you in real life, and I make it a point to keep my personal details (like my full name) separate from my blog/internet "persona". I think I do that less because I'm afraid of judgment, and more in case any potential employers decide to Google my name or something. I just prefer to keep those realms separate, especially because they have pretty much nothing in common with each other (I work in technology, so if anything I might get judged for the code/HTML on my blog which wouldn't be a very fair representation of my technical skills). I also stopped using social media last year, so the only real way I have to show people I know "IRL" my blog is if I tell them directly about it, and that opportunity doesn't come up often. I've casually mentioned that I write a blog to many acquaintances but only close friends have been interested enough to ask for the link (that's fair enough, since my content is pretty niche). This is becoming a long comment, but I guess my point is, it's difficult for me to be worried about an overlap between online and "real life" simply because there hasn't really been an opportunity for it so far.

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    1. That's fair, I think I overgeneralized in this post while speaking on personal experience. I think I may go back and put a disclaimer up top about this being just opinion and not like... legal advice or anything (Just in case!). While writing this I was so focused on thinking about emotional effects that I forgot to mention the other factors like Employers/Schools finding your online life. I'm going to add a little tidbit about that soon. (I'll try to get it done today!)

      Thank you for bringing this to my attention! I do sometimes overgeneralize or get off topic in posts, and also sometimes forget to include important disclaimers.

      Thank you again for bringing this to my attention and thank you for reading this post! :)

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  2. Oh, I don't know if there was a need to put a disclaimer! I don't disagree with anything in your original post, I was just saying that in my current experience I don't really have to worry about anybody from "real" life reading my blog except my friends. I think you can still be confident and proud of your website/content, while exercising caution in keeping your personal details safe—I don’t think that contradicts your original statement at all. :)

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    1. I'm sorry, I should've been more clear about what I meant and why I added the disclaimer- I felt as though the post didn't accurately represent everyone's experiences, and I felt also that it might accidentally become misconstrued. My reply to your previous comment accidentally made it sound like I was assuming you disagreed with the post- I didn't mean to sound like that, sorry! ^-^' I'm feeling sick today so I'm a little off-the-mark. But I do agree that you can be confident and proud of online content while still keeping in mind the idea of keeping personal details safe. I think that's what I meant by adding the disclaimer about employers, though I may adjust it, if I can find the right words in my sickness hazy brain, lol! Sorry for any confusion! ^-^

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  3. I'm sorry to hear you are ill. I hope you get well soon!

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