Going Against the Current – Royals Lesson!

Ciao Royals! Today’s lesson is about something that can be difficult- going against the current. It can be hard to do something that doesn’t mesh with the mainstream trends or social norms. Today we’re going to talk about why it’s perfectly fine to go against the norms and how to feel more confident doing your own thing.

Recently I felt pressured to change myself and my blog to fit in with norms. I felt like I had to do things like dress “normal” and make my blog into a place for only serious topics. But I knew deep down that isn’t who I am. (Not that there’s anything wrong with those things. They just aren’t me). And though I felt pressured to change, I knew I just couldn’t change myself so much and be happy.

Truth is, real happiness can come from just being who you are inside. You will only feel miserable if you try to change yourself to meet other’s standards. Be true to yourself, because the real you is amazing and perfect and wonderful just how you are.

But it can be hard to reject these norms being forced on you, and it can be scary to be yourself. How can we build the confidence to be ourselves in a world that tries to break us down?

OFT has some resources on confidence, including:

And these may help you in your journey, but today we’re talking specifically about how to combat the pressures of society and your peers to conform.

Tip #1- Surround yourself with friends who love you for who you are.
It can be seriously awful when the criticism you face for being yourself is coming from those close to you, so make sure to surround yourself with people who love you for your true self. Throughout high school I had friends who didn’t really like me for who I was, they tried to change me and make me into what they wanted for me. Some of them liked who I was at first, but later when I grew as a person and learned new things about life, and wanted to change some of my behaviors, they didn’t like me anymore. But now I’ve surrounded myself with loving and supportive peers who support my dreams and platonically love me for who I am. 

Tip #2- Be kind, no matter what.
There will be people who will be judgmental of you even if you are kind, but kindness is truly the way to combat judgement. I admit I have difficulty with this sometimes, like if I’m dressed up in my usual somewhat eccentric fashion and somebody stares at me, I have a hard time making myself smile back instead of glare. It can be very, very hard to combat judgement with kindness. But if you can manage it, in the end you will be happier for it.

Tip #3- Have some music you can turn to.
Music is a powerful thing. And in times of darkness, confusion, sadness, or anything else, I like to turn to music. Some of my favorite songs for building confidence are:

-          Dancing’s Not a Crime by Panic! At The Disco
-          High Hopes by Panic! At The Disco
-          Thunder by Imagine Dragons
-          Whatever It Takes by Imagine Dragons
-          SING by My Chemical Romance
-          Legend by The Score
-          Unstoppable by The Score
-          Higher by The Score
-          Centuries by Fall Out Boy
-          Burn by Ellie Goulding

Remember, inside of you is a brilliant light. Don’t let anyone dim it. Don’t let society’s norms dim your shining, brilliant light. (For more on the topic of a brilliant light inside you that you shouldn’t let dim, check out this article !)

Thank you so much for reading today, royals. I hope you can use this advice to find your way in the ocean of life and not get swept up in the undertow of societal opinion.

I love you all, remember to love yourself, and I’ll see you in Friday’s HUGE back to school kawaii guide!

Oh, if you haven't already, please check out our latest video, "Can You Be Both Kawaii and Goth?" (Can you guess my answer?):

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Stay amazing, remember to love yourself, and I'll see you in our next post!