Ciao lovelies! Today’s post is a follow up to THIS post about how there is no expiration date on
fun! Today’s post is going to be about how expressing your “childish” side and
indulging “childish” wants or hobbies can be super healthy to your mental state!
In other words, we’re going to be talking about the unconventional “age
regression” coping mechanism. (TRIGGER WARNING- Mentions of sexual abuse, self harm,
eating disorders.)
(Please note that in this post we are not discussing the hypnosis
level of this coping skill! We are simply talking about tapping into your inner
child for the sake of stress relief and coping with traumas. Also DISCLAIMER- I
am not a medical professional or a licensed therapist. I am simply recommending
this from personal experience, not from a place of expertise.)
Even though this practice is increasing in its popularity,
many have misconceptions about what this is or what it’s good for. The most
simple and truthful definition is this “Age regression is when somebody reverts
to a child-like state of mind, often as a coping mechanism for things like
PTSD, depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues.” And this meaning is
what we are talking about today.
Unfortunately for the sake of this post, there aren’t a lot
of reputable sources for age regression, many of these sources get it wrong,
and most places that even mention it mistakenly assume it is a sexual thing,
when it is absolutely not. And that is why I wanted to write this article, to
create a article that regressors can link back to and use to explain this to
others, to end stigmas against regression and to stop the spread of misinformation.
MYTHS ABOUT AGE REGRESSION:
“Age Play and Age Regression are the same”- This is
incorrect. Age Play is when someone pretends to be a younger age for a sexual reason.
Age Regression is when someone feels like or goes into a younger head space for
therapy/coping/stress relief reasons. The two are distinctly different but
unfortunately get grouped together by ignorance.
“Age Regression requires you to have a ‘Caregiver’”- This is
also incorrect! You don’t need someone to be taking care of you in order to
regress, because regression is based off you, your mental state and your coping
mechanisms/therapeutic methods.
“You must have had a bad childhood in order to age regress”-
Actually, you can have had a perfectly normal childhood and still regress! For
one, sometimes the traumas people are coping with happened later in life, so
they’re regressing to cope with it now, other times for two, people regress for
stress relief not necessarily to relive childhood!
“You can only age regress if you’re mentally ill/Age regression
is a mental illness”- Neither of these are true, as you can regress even if you’re
neurotypical. Age regression is not a type of mental illness but is instead a
coping strategy/therapy method/stress reliever.
EXPERIENCES:
Now, I will share with you some people’s personal experiences
with age regression to help them. Every story shared was shared willingly with
us and we have kept certain people anonymous. The only thing changed in these stories
is grammar/spelling. Everything else is left untouched.
“I regress because I was sexually abused as a child and
teen. When I regress, it’s like I get a new childhood where nothing bad happens
to me. It’s nice to be able to play with toys and color and relax and have the
flashbacks and painful memories stop for once. I have told my therapist about
my regression and she said it sounds like a very healthy coping mechanism. I
used to cut to cope with my PTSD from the abuse, but now I can just regress and
be happy.” – Anonymous
“I started regressing at the end of high school without
knowing what I was doing because I just thought I was childish. I noticed that when
I was regressed I could finally get myself to eat which I had difficulty with
because of my anorexia. The hardest part of it all for me is knowing I can’t
explain myself to the ones I care about because they might judge me or not
understand it.”- Anonymous
"When I was very young I went through a lot of mental and physical trauma, and this continued into my young adult life. I ended up developing a bunch of different disorders causing me to have intense mood swings, flashbacks, night terrors, and panic attacks. I'm in a constant state of extreme anxiety without a cause. But when I age regress I am able to express my emotions and deal with past traumas. It gave me a much needed outlet in what I saw as a world of darkness. It helped pull me out of my depression, and helps me cope in a positive way. I've been regressing for about 3 years, and I have never improved as much as I have in these past years. My regressed state is the only time I'm not constantly anxious and paranoid. My mood swings happen less often and I'm more positive in general. Age regression has changed my life for the better, and become a part of who I am as a person." - (Please note that our source for this quote has left Tumblr and we have no other accounts to source them to- 1/13/19 update)
What do you think of Age Regression as a coping mechanism? Would you ever
try it? Have you? Let us know what you think in the comments!
One last note! Please do be cautious when using this coping skill. I have been informed that it is possible for this coping skill to cause dissociation. Please exercise caution and only do what you feel is comfortable and healthy for you.
If you are an age regressor, we have some more articles for you! Such as:
- Age Regression Journaling
and
-Age Regression Self Care
We also have a YouTube Channel with lots of agere Goodness, like this video:
Thanks for reading! Remember to stay awesome, love yourself, and I'll see you in our next post!
 - Age Regression Series){kind=link}
56 Comments
Interesting article. I know I find myself being in a "younger" or at least sillier head space when I feel at ease or am somewhere I feel comfortable expressing myself. I have anxiety and depression and often when I'm home or around people I trust, I do things like make weird sound effects or animal noises. Kinda helps me express myself without having to really use words. I always thought of it as a kind of verbal tic. On a related note, in high school, I used to ask people questions like a 5 year old (ie, what's your favorite color?) And those of love would answer me every time, even if I repeated the question a lot. It was a little thing, but them answering my silly questions put me at ease, made me feel accepted by them. (And therefore relieving my social anxieties/feelings of no one caring)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your experiences! People often use regression or tendencies of regression in various ways, one of which can be coping with social anxiety! Personally, I sometimes find regressing by accident in social situations can make me a little more timid, but it's really up to the person! Thanks for your comment!
DeleteThank you! Honestly, thank you so so much for this article! It is so hard to find someone who knows what regression is, and I ALWAYS searched for a cute blog where I was feeling comfortable! I finally found it!!! Thank you so so so much for your work!!!
ReplyDeleteAw I'm so glad I could provide a comfortable space for you!! Thank you so much for reading!! <3 -Lunaria
DeleteI'm actually doing a paper for my English class on age regression, mainly because I'm a little and I want to be able to better explain to friends who want to know what being a little means. Thank you so much for writing this article, as it helped tremendously.
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading! I hope your paper went well!
DeleteOh my gosh me too!! I'm literally writing a research paper for my English class on the same topic for the same reason what a coincidence!!!
DeleteThank you, as someone who suffered pretty sever trauma as a child and as a teen you showed me that I was valid, that my coping mechanism was healthy, before I knew about this and read this article I felt like a freak, like I was imature and childish, and you showed me that I was not only valid but I was not alone, I newer had a name for what I did until I found this, thank you for teaching me about myself and age regression, thank you
ReplyDeleteYou are very welcome! I am so glad you can now feel valid! You are so valid!
DeleteI myself am an age regressor. I'm in highschool right now , so it's hard to use it when I really need it which is a bummer. I regress to the mindset of a 2 year old typically because that's the only age that I don't remember there being trauma. I still have a lot of work to do before I've recovered, but age regression has helped me to lessen the amount of physical harm I cause myself.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to hear that you found a coping mechanism that can help some! It can be hard to deal with trauma, especially childhood traumas, so it's important to find a coping skill that can help. I wish you all the best in your recovery!
DeleteWarm regards,
Lunaria L Moon
Oh, and in regards to not being able to use the coping skill because you're in highschool- I've heard that Tumblr and sometimes Pinterest have tips for being small secretly/discreetly!
DeleteBest of luck!
I love your blog about Age Regression it really helped me thank you!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad to hear that we could help! :)
DeleteI love this blog a lot it actually made me realize that I was getting age play and age regression mixed up but I now know that I'm an age regressor to cope with my stress and anxiety. I wasn't sure if I was valid for using it for anxiety. I'm a college student and I want to do it discreetly in classes when my anxiety decides to be a butt but I don't know how to though any tips?
ReplyDeleteWhile I don't personally recommend regressing in a time where you might need to be fully aware (like in class), I do understand that it can help with things like school stress. My best advice is to have some small items you can bring with you that are discreet, like a keychain-plushie or a stim toy. That way you can be half-regressed to cope with the stress in class. I hope this could help!
DeleteI have been told that I have a mental age of 6. I also have anxiety... But I tend to act like a little kid... Well my best friend and I are doing research and is it possible that I am regressing? I mean I'm a little confused so if anyone has any tips or helpful thoughts please comment. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteYou could be regressing, or you could just have a childish personality, or honestly both! It's all about how you feel. Regression is about feeling like your inner child is coming out for a while. Whereas being childish is just simply about acting like a kid without feeling like one. I hope that could clarify a little!
DeleteI sometimes feel like I need to be small, or become small, and I can't always control it. I can yank myself out if I really need to but it's hard and exhausts me. I mostly do it when I'm overwhelmed (I'm autistic) or tired, especially if im watching something childish. I giggle and find it hard to speak properly and stim a lot more. But more than anything i FEEL young. I thought this was just me being a freak again but this makes me feel like it's a bit more normal.
ReplyDeleteIt's totally normal! Everyone regresses at times, whether when sick, stressed, or - like us age regressors who cope with stress, trauma, etc- at various times to cope! It's actually growing to be more and more common as people become educated on the matter more and more. You're most definitely NOT a freak for regressing, I promise!
DeleteIm 15 and I've been abused most of my life which caused me to devolpe anxiety and depression I've know about age regression for a long time my counselor recommend it to me but I'm not completely sure if its ok to be 15 and age regresse
ReplyDeleteMy best advice on this is: if a licensed professional (your counselor) said it was okay , it should be fine. Regression is something that a lot of people do naturally when sick or scared but just don't realize, and Age Regression Therapy merely taps in to that energy for healing purposes. For others with this question, if possible, please ask a licensed professional's opinion on using this therapy method. I hope that could help some! :)
DeleteI'm in Age regression and I love your blogs they help me alot I really feel safe as In regression I have anxiety and it helps when I'm in Age regression I can forgot about my anxiety and be stress-free and have fun for a change I have never felt like this before thank you for this blog I love it
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment! I'm so glad that our blog can help with your regression and help you feel safe!
DeleteI’m a little that uses regression to cope! I had a lot of trauma between the ages of 9-14 and I usually regress to about 2. My boyfriend knows and he is wonderful and accepting and finds it adorable, but I haven’t had the nerve to tell my family yet. I might just send them this! Thank you for it!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad this article might be helpful to you! Thank you for your comment!
DeleteI am 14 as of now and im not sure if im an age regressor or not because i like to act like a child and use sippy cups and stuff and watch kids shows but i am fully aware when i am and i can quickly snap out of it, so i am not sure in im just childish or an age regressor??
ReplyDeleteYou might be regressing, or you could also be Age Dreaming, which is a term I only recently heard of. Age Dreaming, to my understanding, is exactly what you described, where you are participating in childish activities but not regressed mentally. There's actually a big movement of Age Dreaming recently! Of course, there is also nothing wrong with just liking "childish" things too! I hope this could help clarify some. Thank you for commenting! :)
DeleteI have been regressing for a few months now and I regress to about 2-3 years old. I do regress a lot... Is okay to?... I'm a Junior in highschool and taking a college course over the summer. I do have anxiety and depression but I just feel that sometimes I regress cause I really enjoy it. I'm also a pet regresor that regresses to a husky puppy...My agere and my petre mix together, I tend to regress to a little girl but I identify as a wolf....
ReplyDeleteAm I valid and is it okay that I want to regress for a full couple of days uninterrupted?....I don't have a CG IRL.... I can't regress a lot cause of my family, I regress for a bit each night before going to bed....
Sorry if it seems like a sob story or that I am rambling on.
No need to apologize!
DeleteI believe you're valid, even if you want to set aside a few days straight to regress! As long as you can still do your essentials (eating, sleeping, hygiene) and other life needs (like school, etc), there's no issue with regressing! I also believe that you are still valid for regressing just because its fun!
I hope that can help a little! :)
Great post! I am probably much older than most everyone here, and I just realized that I age dream and regress to a certain point. Being an older person I can say that regressing and somehow recruiting others as "caretaker" in a non-sexual way has been extremely healing. I just did this as a way to cope without realizing that it has a name. I think I just realized that no one was going to nurture and care for me, so I had to do it for myself. The people that DID care for me without really realizing it have my profound gratitude.
ReplyDeleteAnyway. I was watching ddlg videos on YT, but I knew the sexual/kink part of it had nothing to do with me at all, so I was always wondering if there was even a place for me. When I was younger, I actually did get caught up in that part of it very slightly, but it always felt very, very wrong for me and uncomfortable. I was always told to ignore my feelings so I thought I was just not accepting who I was. It's super confusing when I type it out lol.
I feel like my post is a bit rambley and confusing, but I wanted to drop it here to hopefully affirm others that are searching and confused like I am. I've always accepted this in myself, but its super affirming for me to have a name for it, and to see others that regress as well.
Lots of love to everyone, and may you all find much healing and peace as you give your inner "little you" all the love they need and deserve.
Thank you for commenting some positivity! :)
Deletethanks for this post. a friend of mine just posted a bunch of things on her story about how agere isn’t some “aesthetic coping mechanism, it’s really SCARY therapy” (her words) and while i know it’s not just about aesthetics, i always thought of it as a coping mechanism you can use for the biggest trauma to the smallest amount of stress.
ReplyDeleteshe also said something about it being a way to secretly take part in kink because she sees it as a power exchange dynamic, like DDLG. while her DDLG little space isn’t sexual, she gives herself up as a submissive while littles in agere do not necessarily do that. i just find it such bs and we’ve had many arguments over it. so ty for this
I'm so sorry your friend is posting stuff like that. Some just do not understand that Agere is a pure and healthy coping mechanism! I hope you and your friend can discuss it further and come to an understanding! Best of luck!
DeleteThank you for writing and sharing! I myself use it to cope with Anxiety and stress, and I always gets scared that I'm 'stealing' the form of coping from abuse victims, so it was really nice to read you didn't necessarily need to go trough trauma to Age-Regress! Still, it's difficult to explain to people close to you, since its mixed in with sexual stuff and seen as some gross taboo thing, and I hope this article ends up informing someone and stop them from misjudging a AR, and possibly loosing someone close to them.
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading! I also hope that this can help inform someone about the truths behind age regression.
DeleteThank you a ton for writing this. As a regressor, I showed this to my friends and family to help with telling them. They fully understood!
ReplyDeleteI am so thrilled to hear that you were able to use this article as a way to explain regression to loved ones! :) Thanks for reading!!
DeleteI really apriecate you making this and I may use it to explain to my friends about my regression if that is ok with you.-Lilly M.
ReplyDeleteThat is absolutely okay with me! Thank you for reading!
DeleteThis was really helpful! im making a powerpoint on age reggression so i have something that can explain it, because i cant explain anything- ive age reggressed before and havent done it recently but with more stress coming up i was thinking of seeing if i can reggress again (horrible spelling of mine lol) i was hoping you had advise to get back into my little space?
ReplyDeleteOMG we have the same name! :)
DeleteI will take some time to build a list of ways to help get back into positive littlespace! Keep an eye out here and on OFT's Instagram (@onlyfunthingsblog). I'll be sure to make an update when I publish something on the blog or YouTube channel about the topic you requested!
Thanks for reading!
After learning about this I think I have already been regressing without knowing really what or why it was happening. A lot of the time after a panic attacks I will only be able to function like a 2-3 year old even my speech patterns And voice change I am not pretending to be 3 I just kinda am 3. I also have had positive things cause little me but it happens mostly when I am overwhelmed or anxious. it is like my brain knew about age regression before I did.
ReplyDeleteThis is super common actually! A lot of people find themselves regressing, either positively or negatively, before they ever even know what it is called.
DeleteI do advise you to take note of your positive causes of regression. These can be called "Positive Regression Triggers," meaning anything you can identify that makes you regress in a happy or positive way. Recognizing these Positive Regression Triggers can help you when you get negatively triggered into regression, you can change that into a positive mental state.
Thank you for reading!
Hi Thanks for writing this im doing an English essay on a topic of my choice and I chose age regression and it helps that a person that regresses wrote this you most likely will be the reason I get a good grade! :D
ReplyDeleteAw thank you so much!! :)
DeleteHello. I've been using this as a stress reliever for me, and I just came out to my dad about it. I'm hoping he understands what it is. But, any tips for like getting little stuff to help me regress deeper? I have been regressing slowly since I have online classes nowadays. And, it gives me a lot of stress so is it ok for me to use agere as a stress reliever? I also find this as a way for me to explore my baby soul.
ReplyDeleteIt's perfectly fine to regress for stress reasons :)
DeleteI'm 12 and want to regress because of stress and mental issues but when I asked my mum she said no because there are "better ways to cope" and she said its mainly for people with trauma. Should I keep asking or regress in secret or give up.
ReplyDeleteI would have another conversation with your mom, and ask her what her concerns are regarding age regression. She mentioned there are better ways to cope, so she may have some in mind, and she may have some personal feelings about age regression, or some personal concerns about your well-being. Voluntary Age Regression (as a coping mechanism) is not supposed to be stressful, so I would advise that if you feel like your mom's concerns regarding agere would lead you to associate agere with stress, or concern, I would not start using age regression at this point. It might be something you want to come back to later in life. I hope that can help!
DeleteI’m 12 years old. I don’t know if I regress or not, but I’ll share tit anyway.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest I can’t remember my childhood. I only know that my dad could get very mad at me for over reacting. When I was around the age of 7/8 me and my dad would go shopping. I remember thinking: 💭I feel like a kid again. I’m so free and childish. I love it.💭
Recently I would get that feeling again but more. I will act extremely childish and I don’t speak grammatical correct sentences. I would get scared of dark and get the feeling that I need someone to watch over me.
I think I got the regression because I have bpd (borderline personality disorder) and extreme anxiety. When I go to little place I wouldn’t worry or stress, it is so calm.
I have heard of involuntary age regression being possible with BPD and anxiety, so that could definitely be a source of it. As for the fear of the dark when regressed, it's common for those who involuntarily regress to have some negative feelings along with it, like fear or intense anxiety. Try to accommodate your regressed self, because even if it's not regression, it's perfectly reasonable to extend compassion to yourself, like buying a nightlight, or allowing yourself to have "childish" interests, etc. :)
DeleteThis post helped me alot! I had a perfectly normal childhood, so I always felt a little bit like a fake whenever i reggresed. Thank you do much for this!!!
ReplyDelete<3 I'm glad I could help! All regression is valid, despite the cause or the person's past. Regression is a perfectly natural response to many things within our minds and emotions, so you should never feel "fake" for your emotions ^-^ You are 10000000% valid!
DeleteI'm confused; how do I tell if I'm actually age regressing or am actually pretending? Nothing feels real, never has; I guess that's par for the course with Autism though...I know if I am age regressing I am doing it voluntarily, it's not something I do in the context of an involuntary reaction (although tbpf I wish I couldn't 'turn it off' sometimes). It's a well established fact of my life, that I am not interested in sex even as my "normal" self so I doubt it's ageplay, but...am I real or just pretending? I wish I knew...
ReplyDeleteIt could be age dreaming, which is a more conscious form of child-mind type of thing, in age dreaming you are doing the activities you would as a regressor but are still able to control your state of mind. I will say also with Autism, i'm autistic myself and i'm perma-regressed which can make it difficult to discover when im regressing and when it's just normal me. That's personally how my autism has affected it, but it's different for everyone.
DeleteType your thoughts here!